After working with hundreds of young athletes, one truth shows up again and again:

The child is rarely the barrier to progress.
It is the parent dynamics surrounding the child that shape everything.

Parents play an enormous role – often unknowingly – in a young athlete’s confidence, emotional safety, relationship with sport, and overall performance. While most parents genuinely want the best for their child, certain behaviours can unintentionally create pressure, fear, or confusion.

Below are some of the most common parent roles practitioners encounter, each with real impact on a young athlete’s psychological wellbeing.

The Over-Involved Parent

• This parent wants every detail, every technique, every conversation.
• To the child, this feels less like support and more like surveillance.
• The result is heightened anxiety and a constant feeling of being evaluated.

The Pressure Parent

• Here, the athlete is stressed not because of the sport itself, but because they are terrified of disappointing their parent.
• Performance becomes fear-driven rather than joy-driven.

The “Instant Results” Parent

• This parent hopes three sessions can fix what has developed over three years.
• They view progress as a quick fix rather than the ongoing developmental process it truly is.

The Identity-Merged Parent

• Their emotional state rises and falls with the child’s performance.
• The child internalises this and feels responsible for their parent’s happiness.

The At-Home Coach

• This parent provides a second layer of coaching that often conflicts with the actual coach.
• The athlete becomes confused, overwhelmed, and unsure whom to trust.

The “Psychology Should Fix Everything” Parent

• They treat mental skills like magic.
• In reality, psychological development takes time, patience, and consistent application—just like physical training.

The Parent Who Uses the Practitioner as Their Therapist

• Sessions become a space for the parent to vent their own fears, frustrations, or emotions.
• Meanwhile, the athlete waits silently on the side.

The Undermining Parent

• Criticising, doubting, or subtly dismissing the child’s efforts slowly erodes self-belief.
• Even well-intentioned comments can land as judgment.

The Blame Parent

• “If they just tried harder…”
• This parent overlooks developmental limitations, emotional maturity, and natural fluctuations in performance.

The Voice-Override Parent

• This parent answers for the child, speaks over them, or dominates conversations.
• The athlete learns that their voice does not matter.

The Defensive Parent

• Any feedback is taken personally or interpreted as accusation.
• This shuts down honest communication and prevents growth.

The Disappearing Parent

• Low involvement, inconsistent support, and lack of structure leave the child navigating sport alone.
• Without stability, progress becomes much harder.

The “Psychology = Winning” Parent

• They expect sessions to produce medals and match wins.
• Mental wellbeing becomes secondary to outcomes.

The Micromanaging Parent

• Monitoring every tool, technique, and email turns support into surveillance.
• The athlete begins to associate sport with scrutiny rather than autonomy.

The Parent Who Wants to Sit in Every Session

• This removes the child’s safe space to open up honestly.
• Confidentiality and trust are essential—and often impossible in the parent’s presence.

The Comparison Parent

• “Look how well they are doing…”
• Comparisons create shame, anxiety, and a belief that the child is not enough.

The Angry or Emotional Parent

• The parent’s reactions become the athlete’s emotional thermostat.
• When the adult escalates, the child spirals.

The Sideline Body-Language Parent

• Arms crossed, shaking head, frustrated sighs – children see everything.
• This nonverbal pressure can be more damaging than words.

The Core Message for Every Sports Parent

Your behaviour shapes the sporting environment far more than your child’s talent does.

• A supportive parent builds resilience.
• A pressured parent builds fear.
• A present, balanced parent builds champions – both in sport and in life.

If you’re a parent, coach, or practitioner working with young athletes, the goal should always be to create environments where children feel:

• Safe
• Seen
• Supported
• And allowed to grow at their own pace

When the adults get it right, the kids almost always flourish.